Welcome back Paul Caporino! As the nucleus behind the legendary Masters of the Obvious (Or MOTO for short), Caporino has crafted hundreds of garage-pop gems for almost three decades now. He’s a regular leather-clad, bayou-bred Shakespeare and a lost Ramone, writing such classics as “It Tastes Just Like a Milkshake,” “Schmuck Factor” and “We are the Rats.” With his inked-up passport and an uncanny knack for capturing life in perfect pop songs, we thought his return home a good time to ask for a little advice. You can catch MOTO on March 14th at the Circle Bar, opening for France’s Sonic Angels. MOTO is also coming out with two reissues on Rerun Records, the 1986 canon Bolt and 93’s E Pluribus MOTO. You’ve heard from him before in ANTIGRAVITY and if Michael Bateman– MOTO’s self-professed #1 fan– has anything to do with it, you’ll certainly hear from him again when his new album, No Sleep Til Turku comes out later this year. But for now, one-two-ready-aim…
What do you do when people who you knew a million years ago try to “friend” you on Facebook? LIke people that you barely hung out with back in school but now all of a sudden want to be your “friend” and catch up, talk about their kids, etc. etc.? I don’t want to be rude but it feels that way if I decline or don’t respond. Is there FB etiquette for that? How can you say thanks… but no thanks?
Well, when people I knew from long ago add me on Facebook, I usually accept them. Some of them have had interesting lives, and maybe if they weren’t that close to you then, doesn’t mean they might not be interested in you now. But I don’t think it’s rude if you don’t respond. There seems to be a different kind of protocol these days, suggested by the Internet. I don’t believe they will think you’re rude. They may just think you don’t have that much time (and they’re probably right).
My girlfriend keeps buying me clothes that I don’t like to wear, but she gets upset when I don’t wear them, like a shirt that looks stupid or a pair of pants that don’t fit right. I want to tell her to cut it out but I know it will make her upset. How can I get her to stop?
You should just tell your girlfriend (as affectionately as possible) that you’d rather buy your own clothes and dress yourself. You certainly don’t buy her clothes (do you?). But invite her to make suggestions. It’s good for her to feel that her opinion matters (even if it doesn’t).
When I got home from college the other day, I was unpacking when my vibrator fell out of my suitcase accidentally. Both my parents were in the room and it got real weird and awkward all of a sudden. It would be something to laugh about except that now when I think about using it, all I can see is the goofy look on my parents’ faces and it kills the mood, to say the least. How can I erase this image from my head? It’s seriously fucking up my routine.
That’s a tough one. Here’s one idea though: have you considered having an intimate friend use the vibrator on you? Or you could masturbate with a new vibrator or something else entirely. Have you felt any attraction to ordinary household items, things you’d find in the kitchen or bathroom– or even food? I had a female friend (I’m assuming you’re a woman) who was attracted to various vegetables and kitchen appliances. She was particularly fond of one of those hammers with a black rubber handle. I’m guessing she didn’t use the claw end.
