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Morris Blart ESQ.

A grayscale illustration of a person walking into a courtroom with a giant, overstuffed briefcase. Their face is gray and their facial features are engulfed by shadow. Their eyes are white holes, so they appear like a zombie. They’re holding their hand up as if to say “stop” as they enter the courtroom. The briefcase they’re holding is almost half their size. There are simplistic outlines of people in the courtroom cheering. They are the same color gray as the benches and the walls: a fixture of the background. Illustration by Luke Howard.

February 2021

CRAW & ORDER

Another day, another losing effort by Louisiana public defenders to sue the State into funding them at the minimal level necessary to comply with the right to representation...

Morris Blart ESQ.
A black and white illustration of a welder with a small crown above their head. The welder has on a welding mask and is dressed in black. They are looking down and welding something in front of them, and there are white sparks coming off of it. There is a tiny gray crown floating above their head. The background is black. Behind the welder is a white circle with rays of white light coming off of it, like this person is holy. Illustration by Luke Howard.

January 2021

CRAW & ORDER

As we stare down the incoming avalanche of horrors that will arrive when federal eviction protections expire, let us also consider who will be overseeing these proceedings. In the...

Morris Blart ESQ.

October 2020

CRAW & ORDER

The year is 2060. I greet the morning dew with a scowl, having again been bodied out of the fire pit’s radius. Unable to risk upsetting them, I go and chop the old growth. And...

Morris Blart ESQ.

September 2020

CRAW & ORDER

There is nothing more important right now in New Orleans than the fight to save the lives of at-risk tenants during the COVID-19 pandemic. And yet we’ve watched as every single...

Morris Blart ESQ.

July 2020

CRAW & ORDER

If you squint just right, you’ll remember the moment just a few weeks ago when the New Orleans Police Department (NOPD) was the belle of the ball. After a round of peaceful...

Morris Blart ESQ.

June 2020

CRAW & ORDER

The times are bleak and here’s one thing I can say for sure: the lawyers won’t save you. Yes, we’ll fight hard, try every trick in the book, maybe even get arrested...

Morris Blart ESQ.

May 2020

CRAW AND ORDER

Dear despondent leftists still holding out hope for electoralism: the single most important election for New Orleanians in 2020 is for district attorney (currently slated for...

Morris Blart ESQ.

March 2020

CRAW AND ORDER

This month we look at two recent decisions from Louisiana’s federal court system. The difference between the federal and state courts of Louisiana is palpable. Due to the...

Morris Blart ESQ.

February 2020

CRAW AND ORDER

Hello, I’m Morris Blart, a country lawyer with a yarn to spin. Welcome to my new column, Craw & Order, where my associates and I review the latest legal decisions and what...

Morris Blart ESQ.
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